Most Inspiring Moment

There are many. I think of this one often… Two years ago, my 6th grade daughter made her first new year’s resolution and said she was making it happen, “I want to get over my fear of being in front of people and having all of the attention on me. So, I’m trying out for the jr. high talent show.” It echoed in my ears as a cold sweat came over me. The JR….HIGH…TALENT…SHOW. Half of me was elated for her and the other half – mortified. Who doesn’t have at least one brutal jr. hi story? What if her fear only worsened? I got off the topic of ME in my head and said, “Lucy, that’s amazing. How can I help?” She said, “I want to sing a solo.” ….a solo. A SOLO. Did I mention this is the jr. high talent show? Not a lot of kids were taking on a solo, much less mine – a 6th grader in a sea of 6–8th graders and mine was NOT in choir. Add to this, the fact she’d had a fear of public...

Reinvention: Do You Have The Guts?

My nine-year-old son and I have this funny game. I have several little spray breath fresheners around. You know – the pocket-sized – squirt of – what the heck was that – painful burning, but delightfully refreshing mint – kind… I love these things. It started as a simple positive hygiene effort, but has evolved to a tiny reinvention of self every time I walk past one of the things and grab it for a minty mouth moment. I self-assess plenty, but there are limits and I’m not overthinking this one. I just have fun with it…and here’s an example. When my son is nearby when I’m going in for a squirt, I always turn to him and say with my best Clint Eastwood vocal drag…DO YOU HAVE THE GUTS? Liam runs away yelling with his arms flailing in the air yelling – NO! NO! NO! Not that!! We laugh every time at the harmless fun...

What’s In A Voice? Lots Actually

Voices reach me like nothing else. The way someone talks to me tells me more than how they look, dress, or even WHAT they say. As in, if I were a superhero and had to have a downfall, the way someone talks to me could be it. If they talk kindly, sweetly, gently – I might crumble and give up all of the information. If they speak to me with a shrill expectant tone, I might find a chalkboard to run my fingers down for a while. I didn’t always know this about myself. I graduated in Communication and voice is a huge part of that pie as you learn to express yourself. My focus was on my own vocal cords and theatrical voice lessons along the way were helpful. That taught me to speak from the grounded place deep inside of me…not my neck which so many people do if you listen to them speak. Breathing and presence are also big parts of this vocal tone puzzle. I voice a lot of...

Boundary Benders – UGH

Ok you have boundaries … now what? Some people don’t respect those lines you draw in the sand at all and fascinatingly look at you as a quintessential buzz kill for holding yours. It’s not your problem. I’ll share that again. It’s not your problem. Hold firm. Better yet, if they keep trying to charm or charge past your boundaries…you are done or at least I’m done on your behalf. I’ll bound over to you and share my boundaries with you if it helps. Be done with this person. If you’ve made your boundaries clear and they just don’t honor that – you can ask about it…but actions speak louder than words. After a couple instances, I’m generally confident in the knowledge of who a person shows me they are. Cut’em loose… Feels better, doesn’t...

Duly Quoted

There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: fear of failure.  -Paul Coelho

Horrifying Moments That End OK

One of my most horrifying memories was when I opened the door of my 1 1/2 year old son’s bedroom after hearing the smoke alarm and saw a room full of smoke. In the thick haze, I could barely see my whimpering son, Liam, standing in his crib a couple feet from the flames on the other side of the room from where I was standing. An oscillating floor fan caught fire and the blaze was 2–3 feet wide, 3–4 foot high, and growing fast. I yelled, “House on fire – get everybody out!” …and ran into the room feeling my way to grab my little boy. I often think of how precious the seconds were that kept him safe that night. I don’t even like to think about what would have happened if I had been even one minute later. The room was damaged as you can imagine, but no big deal there. He was safe. He clung to me for three days after that and then he started to relax and trust his surroundings...

What Do YOU Know Anyway?

I get it. It’s a question that just makes sense. I can talk about all this kindness and decency stuff and make it all sound easy, but what have I really gone through? Instead of sharing my ‘qualifications’ based on a textured background of many deeply moving and painful experiences in one exhaustive list in one post, I’ll sprinkle some through future blog posts. Allow me to point out something profoundly interesting I’ve experienced. Some people run away when they learn about who you are in what you’ve experienced while others come closer. It’s not about you and your value. It’s about their sense of self and inner strength. It’s ok. Let them go. They are doing you a favor. They aren’t your people from this point forward. Others who are your people will make themselves known in time if you make space for them. Yes, it does...

Micro Moment

There is no failure – only redirects loaded with information that will propel you forward if you listen and apply those messages.   -Maria Henneberry