People with a ‘suck it up’ attitude are disappointing. People who live in a world of ‘not my problem’ are demoralizing. People who operate from a place of ‘don’t impact my life with your difficulty’ are discouraging.
I’ve experienced more people justifying their lack of empathy than I care to count. But, it’s an odd kind of situation. It seems to me if you feel the need to justify not empathizing, then you kind of feel guilty about it. So, you are, in essence, ignoring your gut instinct to care.
Uh oh…guess what the means? You are ignoring your heart’s own best instinct to give compassion.
Compassion takes energy – a different kind than many people want to make room for I fear. Compassion has an ambiguity to it. It has an unknowing in it. It is packed with love, but also sadness and a composure to stand strong with someone in a place of awareness of our frailty as human beings.
Is there a lack of accountability in compassion? I don’t think so. Compassion is about tenderness, kindness, warmth. Judgment isn’t in there. Sharing compassion doesn’t mean you have to be someone’s best friend. It doesn’t mean you have to give in to their demands. It doesn’t mean you have to condone their behavior. You don’t even have to be around them. It just means you see with kind eyes the tenderness in our humanness. It’s a kind of giving that actually seems to grow exponentially inside and outside of ourselves.
Compassion is contagious.